“The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion or ethnic background, is that we all believe that we are above-average drivers.”

“I’m a great believer in common sense, and the older I get, I see that common sense is not that common.”

“Keeping up the appearance of having all your marbles is hard work, but important.”

“If I’m ninety and believe I’m forty-five, I’m headed for a very bad time trying to get out of the bathtub.”

“What kind of grandmother am I? I’m a ‘three-dessert’ grandmother. I’m a ‘let’s just skip the bath tonight, honey, and watch another video’ grandmother.”

“Middle Age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that’ll get you home earlier.”